Ravinder Kaur, the founder of the Rehmat Sandhu Foundation, has faced many challenges in her life - from going through a bitter divorce to raising her son as a single mother in India to taking the decision to move to Australia to start a new life and losing her son in a tragic accident that left her shattered.
Yet, Ravinder found the courage to move on, especially in the quest to keep the memory of her son alive and to do something worthwhile for the society.
Ravinder Kaur reminiscences, her marriage was not at all a fairy tale, there were issues right from the beginning. She says she did her best to make it work.
After the birth of Rehmat in 1993, Ravinder was full of joy. She loved spending most of her time with her son. Her husband wanted to go abroad for work and Ravinder was supportive of it, but never in her dreams, she had imagined that her husband would prepone his ticket to Muscat and leave without letting her know.
Things became much worse when she was served with a divorce notice by her husband.
The notice was prepared and given to her by her father-in-law, who was a lawyer. Ravinder was asked to leave her in-laws' house.
Abandoned and left alone, she was left to fend for herself. Ravinder got immense support from her father and brother, but chose to work as a teacher and also as a caterer; delivering homemade food to a few offices in her locality.
From humble beginnings, Ravinder managed to open her own daycare and school that became quite popular in the locality.
Around 2006, Ravinder chanced upon an education abroad seminar.
She saw many people much older to her, looking for options to study abroad.
"I asked myself if people much older than me can think of studying further, then why can’t I do it," she says.
Rehmat, her son had been to a study camp in London, UK a year before, and was always asking if he can go abroad to study.
Ravinder thought this was a perfect chance for her to try and see if she can qualify to get admission and thus put in an application to take up childcare course in Australia.
Much to her delight, Ravinder received a confirmation of enrolment within a few weeks and in a few months, she packed her bags and landed in Sydney, Australia to study.
Source: SBS
She brought her young son Rehmat along who too enrolled in a school.
The initial days in Sydney were full of struggle for her. Getting back to study was difficult, but also living within a very limited means was challenging.
Ravinder got a lot of support from her cousin in Sydney, who took great care of them and helped them to feel at home.
Later Ravinder and Rehmat moved to Melbourne.
Rehmat picked up a job at McDonald’s when he was fourteen and started supporting Ravinder.
Ravinder states, “Rehmat and I were happy with whatever we had, we would enjoy going out together, if we did not have the money for public transport, then we would take long walks but nevertheless make the walk enjoyable. Rehmat would also make sure that I was part of his parties and friends. He would often drag me to the parties along with him, introduce me to various Bollywood and Indian music stars. We were really happy as a family.”
Ravinder also points out that the home that they have now, was planned and built by her and Rehmat together.
Source: SBS
"We both worked hard to get each and every fixture for the house, set up things the way we wanted. It was certainly a dream come true for us," she says.
Ravinder recalls the fateful evening of December 5th, 2014, when Rehmat asked her if he could go for a party with his friends.
She says, “When the party got over he said he would stay back at his friend’s place, I said alright because they were staying in Southbank, which wasn’t too far. He went on the 26th floor where the flat was, he had water there, sent Snapchat to a few people. He also sent his photos of him on the 26th floor... Rehmat was only there for 20-25 minutes.
"From what the boys told me, Rehmat was in the balcony and tried to sit on the railing and fell from there. I still can’t believe it. I still have these questions, that Rehmat wouldn’t have sat there and that he can’t fall from there just like that! In two seconds, our lives changed forever,” Ravinder says.
Rehmat’s tragic death shattered Ravinder.
Source: SBS
She lost hope but she did not want Rehmat to be forgotten. She knew that her boy had lots of dreams and aspirations.
Rehmat was spiritually inclined and his weekly chats with his maternal grandfather were insightful, as his grandfather would guide him about life and religion and human values.
"Rehmat was drawn towards doing something for people in need," she says.
Ravinder decided to put her home in Melbourne and in Jalandhar, India to better use, in memory of Rehmat.
She connected with a few local members within the Indian community in Melbourne and started working on a foundation in the memory of Rehmat.
Source: SBS Hindi
Ravinder gives credit to Jasvinder Sidhu, an academic and a community leader and few other volunteers for helping her out to make her vision a reality.
Once Rehmat Sandhu Foundation was formed, many volunteers got associated with the foundation helping with various social and community works.
Ravinder says, “We have made a Rehmat Sandhu Foundation, through which we do a lot of charity work. We do blood and organ donations. We have solved a lot of cases on domestic violence. I feel very happy to see kids happy. We have also started a widow and kids’ foundation in Rehmat’s name in India.
"We also collected a lot of clothes, toys and books, which were distributed in India. We also work with Anglicare and also work for foster care with Jasvinder Sidhu and other volunteers.
"Soon, I will be going to India for a short trip where I will be finalizing some more projects for the Rehmat Sandhu Foundation.”
About her association with Anglicare, Ravinder says, "I'll be undertaking training in foster care with Anglicare and we will collaboratively organise foster care work. I'll try to devote most of my time to the kids. The philosophy that drives Rehmat Sandhu Foundation is - We cannot help everyone, but everyone can help someone.”
Source: SBS
Ravinder feels helping others is the best way to keep Rehmat's memories alive. She sums up her feelings in a saying from Guru Granth Sahib (religious scripture of Sikhism) – 'Nothing within myself is mine... Whatever there is, is Yours. If I surrender to You... what is already Yours, what does it cost me?'
